New Year, New Me?!?

A couple fun little "Holly facts"...
1. I don't read Horoscopes (or follow/understand/whatever - Astrology).
2. I don't make New Year's resolutions.

Why?  I think it's corny. And I like to believe contradicting things, like "everything happens for a reason" and "my path is already laid out for me, I just have to wait and see where it leads" and "I'm in charge of my future, what happens is what I make happen."  I know, I know... welcome to my mind, I will never claim that it makes sense.

I know "enough" about Horoscopes/Astrology to know that I'm an Aquarius, barely.  According to my friends who are into this, I'm close enough "on the line" to have 2 signs but let's face it, I don't care enough about the one sign to add another.  So, I'm sticking with being a water bearing Aquarius.  (See, I do know "something"!)  Rarely does that fun little fact entice me enough to actually read my horoscope... until yesterday.  When I went to log into Yahoo there was this "Ready to see if your Sun sign will shine in 2012?".  I mean really!?!?  A chance to peek into what my life in 2012 will be like?  No way!  I saw this as a "sign" and decided, what the heck - let's peak.  Now, it seems most logical to me that when you line up the signs for a "year in review" that Aquarius would be near the top, saving me from looking all over the place for it but no, it's near the bottom on the right. This has my over active mind thinking - this is a SIGN that you shouldn't read this because clearly, it's not going to be good news. But... I'm already determined so I click on Aquarius.

"Aquarius"  "This is the year to come out of recent hiding, Aquarius."  No shit, THAT is the very first sentence.  That alone was enough to make me believe there might be something to this whole Astrology thing.  Over the past couple of years, I've let the words and actions of others - most who don't know me at all - to take over, as a result of that, I've stepped back significantly in the work that I do and with the plans I had made for my life.  The sad part about this is - they are people who's lives will be helped by the work that I do. This has been on my mind a lot... a lot... lately so to read that in the first sentence, it hit very close to home and now the prediction had my full attention. The paragraph ends with "It's time to come out of humble reclusion, and let yourself shine!" ... and you know what... it is!

Everything in this first article (there are 3 sections - overall, career and romance) - nailed things I have been currently mulling over.  How my role in my family will change, money ... oh, money...it says the funniest little thing there - "The upside is that Neptune in your financial house could bring an inspiring and soulful means for you to earn money. The arts - film, dance, photography or painting, in particular - could play a bigger role in your income than in years past."  I decided that this to mean that my sun sign is telling me I should consider being a "dancer" (or stripper, you chose) however, my very dear best friend who knows me better than anyone, Melissa, pointed out that the "arts" also included writing (which I was really wanting it to mean but let's face it if I could go home and say to my parents one of two things...1. Mom, Dad, I'm a stripper!!  or 2. Mom, Dad, I'm an author!! - 1 would be much more hysterically entertaining!  Well, at least to me...I have no idea why I'm the odd one out in my family...).  The truth is, as Melissa knows, I have 2 books basically finished and waiting for me to send out into the real world.  There is a 3rd in the works and I'd love to debut all 3 at once but, I have to let go of them first and see if there is an editor/publisher who agrees and helps me take the leap.  So, this year. This year, I finish them and send them on to see if they can be given real life and help countless others who I know will benefit from the words I have written. 

The "career" section was just as motivating and again, nailed my life. Apparently I'm "about to be called upon to step into the biggest shoes of your life. No playing small! This is your year to see and be seen, Aquarius."  Score!!!  :-)


The "romance" section was fun and entertaining but honestly, it was the first two sections that have my attention but it's nice to know this part of my life will exist!

My Astrology friends are doing happy dances right now that I'm printing this off and tucking it under my calendar to see just how much of it will happen.  I don't believe it will happen on it's own, I still believe I have to make this happen.  (Although if it will happen from me taking a nap or adding in a good long run each day instead of actually working to become this huge shining success pleeeaaasseee let me know because clearly I need some guidance!)


What reading this very encouraging 2012 preview did for me was wake me up and remind me that I do have plans and goals and it's time to make them happen.  Which brings me to New Year's Resolutions - outside of one rather entertaining one I made once that we are *not* going to speak of - I don't make them.  Why? I don't believe in setting myself up to fail, which, to me is exactly what New Year's resolutions are.  However, if I want to pull out this review at the end of the year and reflect on how incredible my life is after such a stellar year, I need to make some changes so I can make that happen.




So here we go my 2012 resolutions are:
1. To thicken my skin, if I'm going to put myself, my heart and my words out to the world on a grander scale than I already have with my keynote speaking - I have to understand this also opens up my world to negativity. It's my choice to let this bother me or let it go.  This year, I will thicken my skin and let it go.  My friends will help me.
2. Write.  Write.  Write.   It's time. The books will get finished, they will get sent onto someone who can help me get them published and sent out into the real world to make a positive difference in the lives of the people I love so much, especially in the FX world who I've let down by not making this happen for them yet.  I will do this.  For me and for you.
3. Run. Last year I started running again and ran my first 5K.  (3 total!)  This year, I will run a 10K before the year is over.  I predict a fall 10K because let's face it, I will always think it's insane to run in the summer when it's a thousand degrees outside :-)

3 is my limit.  I like to be successful ;-)

The fundamentals of who I am don't fall under "resolutions" or "goals" or even any greatly written horoscope.  They are the things in life that are most important to me and no matter the year, the plan or the resolution - I will continue to do these things only better.
I will continue to be the very best mom I can be, my children are my life, my soul and the reason I breathe and believe in all of the great things life has to offer. I will hug more, laugh more, play more, teach more and be frustrated less.
I will continue to be a really great friend.  (I heard you laugh at that M and P, I am really great... sometimes!) My friends are the reason I push, the reason I believe in me, the reason I randomly smile or bust out laughing at a moments notice (and usually at inappropriate times).  I've always been on the outside looking in when it comes to friendships until recently.  Last year, at 37 I discovered that for the first time I could honestly say I had a very best friend - 2 at that, how lucky can one person get?!?!  I had someone who was unconditional, who would always be there, always love me, always support me - and better than all of that, really "get" me without  explanation. I'll never let that go what I will do is promise to always be here, to always listen to always love, celebrate and even (sadly) hurt with you. 
I will continue to love my job and the work I do. I love the fx world, I love making a difference, I love the direction we are going. I will just do better and more and more better! ;-)

Well, that's exhausting.  I'm glad I have 12 months because this will require a nap or two to keep up this level of energy.

2011 was pretty amazing.... for 2012 to be the year I shine... I recommend we all go find some really cool sunglasses, fast!

Happy New Year!