Willow Wishes

There isn’t a Willow without a Parker. I believe almost every dog has an incredible ability to sense when something is wrong. I’ve seen this with many great dogs. And, like Willow, I’ve seen some even respond appropriately to help in those situations even though they have not had any formal training.

When Willow joined our family, I was anxious… anxious on if she would or could bond with Parker. I truly needed her to for this to work seamlessly. (We would have made it work no matter what but seamless is always preferred!). So when we went to pick out our sweet girl, I let the puppies do the picking.

I watched as they all ran toward Parker, until he started to jump and squeal with his hands close to his face. When that happened all of the puppies, but one turned and made a beeline to A. That one puppy, though, with the green collar with markings, she didn’t stop. Instead, she ran right to him, he scooped her up and told her how much he loved her while I quickly checked the collar. We passed her around and put all the puppies back down to play. She stayed closest to Parker. She knew. She knew she was up for this “job” of caring for him, of making his life easier and she hasn’t left his side since that day that she picked him.

Willow knows when Parker is stressed or anxious. If she isn’t already by his side, she goes to him and doesn’t leave him until he is ready for her to go. Even when she is at her most favorite place on earth… Grandma and Grandpa’s house.

Recently during a visit to Grandma and Grandpa’s, Parker abruptly decided he was done, which is usually how Parker decides he is done – abruptly and aggressively. Willow stopped playing with Jessie (their dog) and looked at Parker, I pointed to him and she went to him. She really wanted to keep playing with Jessie but she stopped with that nudge and went to her boy where she knew she should be. She jumped up on the couch with him, laid on her back across his lap and lifted her nose to his face to give him kisses. When he was calm, I asked him if he wanted to wait in the car – knowing it would still be a bit before we left – he said yes. He went to the car and without me saying a word, Willow followed.

Together they sat in the car listening to music until we left. Twice I tried to get her to come out and run one more time, both times she refused. Until she is sure he is ok, she won’t leave his side. She’s a year and a half old – that’s pretty dang amazing to me.

I have the honor of watching these two every single day. Every day, I’m amazed at the difference they make in each other and in awe of their bond.

I sometimes wonder what Willow thinks about beyond how much she loves her boy. She’s happy, she’s spoiled, she’s extremely loved – and I think she knows all of that. I wonder when she sees people look at her boy what she wishes they knew about him and from that Willow’s Wishes came to be.

This is what I believe Willow wishes you knew.

Willow wishes you could see beyond his disability, like she does, straight to his heart and soul to see the incredible guy that he is. Then you could see how much his heart loves, even when he cannot express it and how much it breaks when he can’t say or do things he wishes he could. Things people take for granted, like independence. Parker needs someone with him 24/7.

Willow wishes you knew how much he loves others. If you are someone important in his life, never take that for granted. That list is short, and those people are treasured. If you make that list, he doesn’t have high expectations, but he knows when he has been forgotten. It’s hard as friends get older and move forward with their lives. But it’s not that hard to check in, to drop him a text, call him on messenger, or stop by and see him. If you think that’s just too much to ask, Willow wishes you could live in his mind and body for just a day because then you would realize this is the smallest of requests and understand how much he notices when you stop responding to him.

Willow wishes you knew that his laugh is the best! It is pure and it is contagious, truly one of the greatest sounds.

Willow wishes that you knew his struggles. She wishes you knew the amazing difference her plopping her 90 lb body on him makes when he is overwhelmed to help regulate his body and senses. She wishes you could feel the release of his tension when he is mid-meltdown and she puts her nose in his face, distracting him with kisses until he is ok. Like he is holding up a falling building on his shoulders and Hulk comes in and lifts it off of him, freeing him from that weight – that relief is felt by Willow every single time. She wishes you could feel the difference in him when that weight it lifted and how he relaxes when the tension leaves his body.

Willow wishes that as much as she sees her boy as perfect, she could see him enjoy life every day without the significant struggles he faces.

Willow wishes you knew that being 22 but functioning as a young child is a challenge every single day that you can help change.

Willow wishes that you understood just how incredibly hard life with Fragile X syndrome is every single day for her boy. Every day there is a challenge. Every day takes effort. Every day has laughs. Every day has frustrations. Every day is exhausting. Fragile X syndrome is the leading cause of inherited intellectual disability and leading genetic cause of Autism and it’s hard. It’s really hard.

Willow wishes you knew she loves naptime with Parker as much as she loves running at the park with him.

Willow wishes you knew that every night when Parker goes to bed, he yells “Goodnight Willow, I love you” and that it is the sweetest thing ever.

Willow wishes that you understood the fear that I have each night when I go to bed about what the future will bring, that no matter how much I plan that it won’t be enough. That I worry about who will love him unconditionally as I do when I am gone.

Willow wishes you understood that while she is very young, she won’t be here forever and that is just one of many reasons why she needs your help.

Willow wishes that you knew that the key to Parker’s independence and his future is in funding Fragile X research. She wishes you knew that clinical trials are showing amazing improvement in adults older than Parker.

Willow wishes you knew that an effective treatment for Parker IS realistic, and it will happen. How fast it happens depends on all of us.

Willow wishes you knew how important having that available to him is to her and to our family.

Willow wishes you knew how important her boy is to her, that she loves Parker more than anyone – even Grandpa. Willow wishes you knew how much she wishes she could enjoy life with him without his struggles so they could do even more together.

Willow wishes you knew that while his language isn’t perfect, his mind isn’t perfect, his life isn’t perfect… his heart is and just as he would do anything for you she hopes you will do this for him.

Willow wishes you knew that FRAXA is accelerating that research at an amazing pace and they need your help.

Willow wishes you would make a donation to FRAXA Research Foundation in honor of Parker – or in honor or Willow and Parker today.

If you donate to FRAXA on GivingTuesday (11/30/21), donations up to $50,000 are being met with a 3:1 match, quadrupling your impact! 

If you donate during the Annual Appeal, it will help them meet their end-of-year goals. 

If you donate monthly, you can know that every single month you are helping the researchers get closer to that effective treatment that will change Parker’s life. 

No matter what time of year this message finds you, you can make a difference by donating at fraxa.org

Willow wishes that if you are not in a position to donate that you will share her love for Parker and hope for his future with your family and friends.

Willow wishes you knew how much this means to her and that she can’t wait to share more of their adventures together with you.

Willow wishes you knew that just as she makes a difference in Parker's life every day, so you can! You can make a difference in his future by supporting FRAXA who is funding research that will lead to effective treatments and ultimately a cure for Fragile X syndrome.